


Why the Batfamily isn't Allowed to play Neko Atsume Around Each Other

by Vigilante of Fanfics (knight_of_the_internet)



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Superman - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, M/M, batfamily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-23 21:40:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6130966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knight_of_the_internet/pseuds/Vigilante%20of%20Fanfics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Batfamily plays Neko Atsume</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why the Batfamily isn't Allowed to play Neko Atsume Around Each Other

**Author's Note:**

> This is a perfect compromise between two things I love: Batfam and Neko Atsume

"Alfred what are you doing?

  
"Indulging in one of the few pleasures of life Master Clark"

  
"And one of those pleasures is playing 'Neko Atsume'?"

  
"Yes." was all the butler simply answered.

  
"Is that cat named after Bruce?"

  
"Actually, I have named all the cats after all the members of this family."

  
"Even _Selina_?"

  
"She was the one who turned me onto this game."

  
"Hmm." was all Clark said.

 

* * *

  
"- and Damian is hanging out with Colin this Saturday so we need to plan accordingly for that." Bruce said.

  
"Hmm." was all Clark replied.

  
The 'power couple' (I'm laughing way too much at my own joke.) was lying in their four poster, large bed. Both of them were on their phones. Bruce was checking his family's itenerary for the week and Clark, well, Clark was...

  
"Clark what are you doing?"

  
"Yes honey?"

  
"What was I just talking about?"

"Titus' vet appointment."

  
"Nice try but it was Alfred's." Bruce deadpanned. "I'll ask again, what are you doing?"

  
"So there's this game..."Clark started, but Bruce quickly snatched the phone away from Clark.

  
"You named a cat after me?" Bruce said in an unemtional tone. "And his personality is 'Hot and Cold'?" Bruce just sat there with Clark's phone in hand, silent for about a minute. Clark was terrified of what would happen next.

  
Finally Bruce opened his mouth to speak. "He is kind of cute." he simply said.

  
Clark relaxed and smiled cockily as he leaned forward to kiss Bruce. As he was doing so, he said, "It's cute. And 'hot'. Just. Like. You."

  
Clark's phone ran out of battery because he and Bruce forgot to turn it off.

* * *

  
"Hey Bruce, my phone is out of battery, can I borrow yours to tell Babs I'll be home late?"

  
"Go ahead Dick, we have a long night ahead of us so I'll just call Clark when you're done."

  
That was an understatement. Apparently Riddler and Scarecrow teamed up to formulate a new fear gas formula using Killer Croc's DNA so the only way to come up with a cure or immunization was to have a tissue sample from Killer Croc.

  
"Hey Bruce?"

  
"Yes Dick?"

  
"Why'd you name a cat after me in Neko Atsume?"

  
Bruce quickly turned from the screen he was monitoroing. 

  
"Clark was playing the damn game... and it's kind of soothing to play."

  
"That's great, but why'd you name this cat after me?"

  
Bruce sighed, "Because, when you were younger, you wanted to be a cowboy and you'd insist to dress up as one this one Halloween and that was the first time I had seen you so happy that year."

  
Dick paused to take in the the sentiment. He almost went up to hug Bruce, but then he read the personality description.

  
"Hey! Since when am I nihilistic?"

  
"IT MEANS NOTHING. JUST TAKE IN THE SENTIMENT AND GET BACK TO WORK DICK."

* * *

  
"Babs could you take a moment to make sure my phone's back to normal? I don't trust whatever Jason did to it."

  
"Sure babe."

  
Quickly, Babs plugged in Dick's phone into her computer. After running a basic diagnostic check, she turned to hand the phone back to Dick, but he wasn't there. So instead, she decided to further rumage through his phone until he returned.

  
*Five minutes later*

  
"Hey Babs, sorry, I just stepped out to get a snack- Babs? Are you playing on my Neko Atsume?"

  
Babs shut off the phone and handed it to Dick, "Sorry, but not really. Did you really name a cat after Jason? You will realize he will go after you for that. Right?"

  
"I am fully aware of the penalties, but he'll never figure it out... right?"

  
"I swear on my moniter."

  
"Great! Now I have about twenty minutes before I have to go out on patrol..."

* * *

  
Cassandra Cain walked into Babs's and Dick's apartment.

  
"Babs?" she called out

  
"In the kitchen Cass!"

  
"Coming!" Cass called back.

  
"Oh and can you grab my phone? I left it on the living room table!"

  
Cass quickly grabbed Babs's phone and walked into the kitchen.

  
"Here." she handed the phone to Babs.

  
"So Cass, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

  
"Jason said something strange to me." she simpy replied.

  
"Oh?" Babs asked.

  
"He told me that we move in together. But I do not wish to move into what he called his 'bachelor pad'."

  
"OHhhh." Babs said in realization. "Well, I don't have my laptop with me so I'll show you this on my phone. There's this one apartment Dick and I found that I think you guys will like."

  
"What's that?" Cass was pointing to the app icon of Neko Atsume.

  
"Oh this? It's just this one cat game. You might like it actually..."

* * *

 

"Cass, Babe?" Jason called out as he entered the manor the day him and Cass were scheduled to move into their new appartment. Jason quickly swung by to gather all of Cass's things that remained when she lived in the manor.

  
"LIBRARY!" Cass's voice called out.

  
Jason ran so fast to the library that in a couple of seconds he stood at its entrance. His heart was pounding, not all from the running. He was so impressed he said, "WALLY WEST WHO?"

  
"Hi honey." was all Cass said.

  
He quickly went up to give her a hug and a kiss and sat next to her on the loveseat she was sitting on while she was reading a book. Instantly, he snuggled up to her side and put his head onto her lap.

  
"Aren't the movers from the company gonna bring in the bed sometime soon?"

  
Cass shrugged. "Check phone."

  
Jason took the phone in quetion off of the armrest and unlocked it. "Hey Babe?"

  
"Hmm." Cass hummed in reply.

  
"Why is there a cat named Jason on your game?"

  
"Like you, he is peculiar. Also, I think he is the cutest of all cats."

  
"Is that so?"

  
"Yes."  
  
They were ten minutes late to meet the movers from the company.

* * *

  
"Yo replacement!"

  
Tim sighed. "What Jason?"

  
"Fetch my phone will you?"

  
"Sure."

  
As Tim walked over to give the phone to Jason, the phone started playing "My Heart Will Go On".

  
"Ooh. That's probably Cass. Read the text she sent me."

  
"This better not be a sext Jason. I see Cass as a sister..."

  
"Get your mind out of the gutter, we're just talking about Neko Atsume."

  
"Have you gotten the extension yet."

  
"I'm close..."

  
"Sometimes you dissapoint me..."

* * *

  
"Tim?" Conner said as he was being the big spoon in their cuddle session.

  
"Hmm" Tim hummed he was currently doing something on his phone.

  
"I just want to say that I-"

  
"Look Kon, I'm getting a memento."

  
"What?"

  
"And look, it's from you."

  
Tim turned so that he would be facing Conner.

  
"I love you." was all Tim said

  
"I love you too." Conner said as he drew Tim into a deep kiss.

* * *

"Alien Step-brother of mine!"

Conner took a deep breath. "Yes Damian?"

  
"Inform me at once what it is you are doing on your phone!"

  
Conner sighed. "I'm just playing a game Damien."

  
"Likely story. I bet you and Drake are sending each other naughty texts." Damian said smugly.

  
"Even if we were, it would be none of your business."

  
Damian stood in silence for a moment. Then, he quickly knocked Conner off of his feet and grabbed the phone.

  
"Oh." Was all Damian said. Conner _was_ playing a game. About cats. And he named one of the cutest cats after Damian himself.

  
Quickly, Damian begrudingly helped Conner up and handed him his phone back. Conner was already in a state of bewilderment, but was even more confused when Damian hugged him and stalked away all in what seemed like a second.

* * *

  
"Hey Dami, have you seen my phone charger?"

  
"What do you need Brown?" Damian emotionlessly said while not looking up from his handheld device.

  
"I just need to talk to Cass about the house warming party at her and Jason's place."

  
Damian took a quick glance at Stephanie and then looked back down. Without looking up, he handed her his phone.

  
"Just use mine. The pasword 1048."

  
"AWw." she hugged up from behind by his neck. "Thanks little D."

  
Damian silently smirked to himself as he removed her arms from his body.

  
"Damian..." Stephanie started, "why did you name Tubbs after me?!"

  
"I do not see a problem with that Brown."

  
"Why not?" she asked, her voice showing her slight irritation.

  
"Because you're a fatass 'Fatgirl'." Damian's smirk grew wider.

  
"Take it back. NOW."

  
"I must not tell lies." he said.

  
"THAT'S IT!"

* * *

  
ten minutes later

* * *

  
Alfred, Bruce, and Clark walked into the room.

* * *

  
One trip to the Batcave infirmirary later

* * *

  
Realizing the entire family was present Bruce and Clark decided to make an anouncement.

  
"Listen up!" Bruce practically barked. "None of you are allowed to play Neko Atsume within a three-feet rasius of each other."

  
Half of the small crowd groaned.

  
"Unless, you are with you significant other." Clark quickly added.

  
"Failure to comply and," he glanced at an injured Steph and Damian, "Neko Atsume will be banned from the manor."

  
Everyone quickly grew somber.

  
"Are we understood?" Bruce asked.

  
"Yes." the entire group said in unison.

  
"Great. Now about mementos..."

* * *

  
"And that, Ms. Kane and Miss. Kent, is why Neko Atsume must not be played within a close range of any other family members." Alfred informed Kate and Kara.


End file.
